News from The Marriage Factory

As promised our guest blogger Joe is back.

It's been a long time since I've written.  A lot has happened.  I'll hit the highlights.

The week after same-sex marriage was legalized (or de-de-legalized), the marriage factory was empty.  I did maybe 8 ceremonies.  The next week, I did 30 in 4 1/2 hours.  Le deluge, indeed.  The couples were all grateful, and almost all sweet.  Standouts include the men who had matching bow ties.  I was wearing one as well, purchased for the occasion by my wife from Jessie Tyler Ferguson's marriage-equality-supporting company, tietheknot.org.

After the initial rush (20 ceremonies the next week, 18 the week after that), things calmed down, as I knew they would.  The average is 12-15 ceremonies, with the volume picking up toward midday.  The summer has been busier, so I wasn't surprised to read that Miss Janet kept busy when she filled in for me.

Last week's couples were almost all dressed for the occasion, from those with one witness to a crew of 20 or more.  It wasn't until the end of my shift that I got a t-shirt & jeans couple.  Trumping all comers were a group from an African country.  Each woman in the crowd wore a different color.  They posed for pictures in the lobby, and it looked like a rainbow - so beautiful!  I also had two couples with English grooms.  That accent!  No wonder their spouses fell for them.

This week, there was an early wedding with a problem that pops up every once in a while: the member of the couple who does not speak English.  No worries for me if his/her language is Spanish - I do Spanish ceremonies every week.  This time, he spoke French.  My wife's French is good, but mine is non-existent.  As usually happens in these cases, there was a witness who was translating most of what is going on.  That person cannot translate the vows, however.  The groom must agree to the marriage without prompting.  The translator is only trying to help, but unfortunately, we must be rude and ask her to stop talking.  Luckily in this case, the groom understood enough to tell me that he wanted to marry his bride, and everything else went off without a hitch.  I used Google Translate to learn how to ask the necessary question: Voulez vous epouser BRIDE'S NAME?  Now I am prepared - unless the couple speaks German.  Then I'm out of luck.

--
Joe Mallon

Joe tells us more

Guest Blogger Joe Mallon has written about last Friday at the Marriage Factory.

My shifts at the marriage factory have been slow lately, averaging 5
or 6 couples.  Today, things were a bit busier.  I married 15 couples
in 3 1/2 hours.  That's one couple every 14 minutes.  For the entire
time I had at least one couple waiting to be married.

In such a whirlwind, a few stood out:
The couple who held their 2-month-old as they said the vows.  The
mom/bride was so happy she grinned ear to ear the entire time.  The
dad/groom looked shellshocked, but relieved after the ceremony.

The couple whose toddler would not stop running around the wedding
room, pulling on everything.  I rarely stop a ceremony, but I did
twice to try to stop the kid.  No dice.

The couple who were obviously completely in love with each other and
with getting married.  He was wearing a suit with a boutonniere and
she had a simple lace dress and wrist corsage.  I don't get choked up
often, but that one had me smiling very broadly.

The couple whose guest was just a minute away from joining them - for
15 minutes.

Lovely clothes, bridal division:
* Black-and-white checked minidress with black heels and a canary
yellow cardigan
* 2 floor-length shoulderless gowns, one floral with a beaded
neckpiece and one red and scalloped
* Turquoise Chanel-inspired suit
* A few lace dresses, all perfectly appropriate

Not lovely: the groom in "snakes and car grille" t-shirt and ball cap.

Again a big thank you to Joe for sharing his experiences as a Marriage Commissioner. 

 

And now a word from Joe

I recruited Joe Mallon as a Marriage Commissioner several years ago.  Well, really I asked his wife and she said thanks, but no thanks.  Joe was all but jumping up and down, pick me, pick me.  Staff loves him.  Joe is on time and there every week.  He speaks English and Spanish.  He can move the couples in and out quickly yet in a gracious manner.  He is good. 

Joe’s wife writes a blog and he guests blogs on that sometimes.  He asked if he could guest blog for me.  I am honored to be asked.  I am proud to present his first guest blog on I Have No Endings.  

Take it away Joe . . .

Does age matter?  The first couple were 20 years apart, but obviously in love.  The groom had not expected the ceremony to be so moving.  He even asked for a copy of it.

The second couple was the opposite - both young, the bride chewed gum, the groom put a no-doubt-intended-for-ironic-effect pause between "lawfully wedded" and "wife".  They both laughed during the vows, and
not the nervous laughter that occasionally comes out as tears.

A word about cameras: Can't someone get cameras so they all work the same?  So much time is taken up with a bride or groom teaching a witness how to use the phone camera.  Also, how about a longer pause before the picture disappears from the viewscreen?  The current time is just enough for me to take the picture  (which I offer to do for groups) and almost get the camera into someone's hands.  It goes like this: *snap*, step step step, "take a look", fumble with camera trying to get back to the image that was visible 1.5 seconds ago.

The most interesting clothing of the morning was a bride who wore a mid-thigh trench coat.  I tend to get more conservatively-dressed folks than Janet, so the young lady's attire made me a little nervous.  However, when she took off the coat, she was wearing a lovely shoulderless white dress with beading, appropriately cut.  To make things even more enjoyable, the witnesses were twins with the same name except for one letter, like Eddie and Teddy, both also  well-dressed.  An altogether pleasant experience.