Sunday, November 20, 2011

Weddings, odds and ends Part 2

Before I perform the marriage ceremony I go out to find the couple and greet them.  I shake hands with them and tell them who I am.  I get the group together and then we go upstairs.  I run through our set rules and questions, explain where and when they can take pictures, and then I do the ceremony.  About 95% of the time all that runs like clockwork.  Today we will also have an example of the 5% who make me rethink volunteering.

I had a darling sweet Indian couple who had gone to Mexico with friends for a destination wedding.  Except they didn't do their research.  There is a waiting period in Mexico and blood tests to be done before you can buy a marriage license.  They weren't there long enough to be able to buy license.  So they had a lovely "ceremony" on the beach.  I was to do the legal ceremony, and they will have a cultural ceremony in January. 

It is traditional for Indian grooms to ride in on a white horse or an elephant as part of the wedding ceremony.  I asked the groom if he was going to ride a white horse.  No, an elephant.  I asked him if they were marrying at the zoo.  Ha ha, I am soooooo funny.  Nope, they are marrying in Bombay.

The next couple was the happiest couple ever. They hugged and kissed during the ceremony. They laughed with sheer joy throughout the ceremony. As soon as I pronounced them married, they asked me to take a picture of them to text to their daughters. Yes the picture was of them laughing.

Now to the 5%.  Clerk L brought me the license.  She said they are a little flaky.  I go to get them. I call their names nothing.  I walked into the front lobby no one there, but I called their names, they might me in the hall. Nothing, I call a third time.  Nothing.  I find L and ask what do they look like.  She says, "I'll find them.  The bride is a ditz!"  She takes off at a near run, and I am behind her.  She goes through the lobby at warp speed.  They aren't there.  She looks outside, not there.  She is royally ticked.  "I told them you would be out in about 5 minutes, you would bellow their names, and then you would take them upstairs.  We discuss maybe they thought they were married and went home ( have had a couple do that). 

The deputies hear us talking, look at the monitors, and say there are people in the wedding room and no commissioner with them.  I start for the elevator and L is with me.  She charged off the elevator and went into the wedding room.  It was the missing couple.  She fusses at them for not listening to her rules.  They say OK sorry, we're done,  and leave!  I went after them and asked, 'Where are you going, you aren't married yet?" " Oh, we aren't?"  I married them, walked them to the Marriage Desk clerk  D, and then made sure they made it to the elevator.

D and I decided this couple should never breed.

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